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United 4-0 Chelsea: 5 Things We Learnt As United Slaughtered The Blues For Sallah

Manchester United cut the ribbon of their 2019/2020 season, by slaughtering 'bad-bele' rivals Chelsea for the sallah celebration with a 4-0 win.

Here are five things #ManUtdNaijaFM learnt from the season opener:

The world record signing had a fantastic debut. His composure on the ball was a delight especially as United were on the defensive for a greater part of the game.

He had the highest Interceptions(7), blocked shots(2) and clerances(7). To add 'palm wine to the Nkwobi', he created one chance and did not commit a single foul!! A Naija name is loading sir!

The new right back put up an 'Issakaba boys' display. He was clearing the ball like a cutlass, sharing tackles like a father Christmas, and sliding all over the pitch.

He did these with swag and confidence as he also did not commit a single foul!!. A single Naija tribe name may not be enough; a 'Wazobia' name is needed.

Third new signing Daniel James made his entry in the second half and his dreams came to pass at Old Trafford, the theatre  of dreams, as he scored the last goal of the game.

He is a fast-paced player and we hope he uses his pace to good use at United. HE SHALL BE CALLED DANIEL 'OSONDU' JAMES......(Osondu= Race of/for life)

With United's new defensive signings, it appears the wall may now be complete. If you pass our Issakaba boy and Lindelof, Maguire will be there. If you pass him, the ever ready David 'Osinachi' De Gea will be on ground to welcome you.

The French forward led the attack today after winning the 'election' to become the new 'commander-in-chief' of United's strike force.

Contrary to the Martial of last season, we saw passion, drive and desire. He scored a typical poacher's goal which is a good sign. He needs to quickly develop those striker instincts again as he was often guilty of too many touches in the box today.

IN THE END, Pogba's two assists today were simply 'Chivita-stic'. Hate him or love him, he is the best creative player in the team currently. We hope he puts his head down and plays football.

It was a convincing scoreline for United, but certainly not a convincing win as Chelsea dominated most of  the game.

Good way to start the season......May the goals flow, may the three points fill our bag, and may our glory days return.

What did you think about the season's opener?
Who was your man of the match?

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